Sailor Martin

Age: 50-ish

Occupation: Former merchant marine. Gadabout. Puppet operated by Max Sparber. Unlikely movie star.

Residence: I live in a houseboat on the Mississippi River.

Twin Cities Resident: 1 year. Former resident of New Orleans, fled north because of Katrina.

SEVEN QUICK QUESTIONS:

1) What place in town considers you a "regular"?

The Double-Deuce, the Triple-X Adult Superstore, that drive-in liquor store on Franklin, several Catholic girls schools.

2) Name one rich person in the Twin Cities who you hate. Just one!

Ned Beatty. Hollywood needs your talent, Ned! Get off whatever Northland lake you're on and get back to work as America's greatest character actor!

3) Who is the greatest Minnesotan of all time?

Bullwinkle J. Moose.

4) What are you doing on Saturday afternoon at 3 p.m.?

Sleeping it off.

5) If you could rename St. Paul, what would you call it?

I don't know why it ain't still called Pigseye.

6) What the best show you ever saw at First Avenue?

I was up here in the 90s and saw Weapon of Choice and The Fugees. It was a nutmeg potty!

7) What is your favorite drink, and where do you get it?

Sailor Jerry rum. I get it at the Drive-In liquor store on Franklin.