117 Comments:
Umm...bah...dude...I don't even know what to say about this article...
"The Funniest Woman in the Twin Cities"?
Bitch please!
»» Submitted by just sayin' at 11:19 AM on June 5
Yeah, I'm pretty sure if you have to tell people that you're funny, you're probably not...
Wait a second... my best friend is a Latino 30 year old man who cooks for me if I bring him wine. OMG! Stop the presses!
»» Submitted by Christine at 11:26 AM on June 5
Having multicultural friends and lovers is so, like, 2007. Duh.
»» Submitted by Christine at 11:31 AM on June 5
Yeah, my friends were way more multikulti back east than my friends here are. It's pretty honky whitebread I-come-from-smalltown-minnesota so far.
»» Submitted by »»» wayne at 11:31 AM on June 5
Judging by the trackback, I guess we got back to the same post ID as the new editor announcement thread...
»» Submitted by »»» matt at 11:35 AM on June 5
I tried reading the rest of her entries and I'm still stymied...
WHAT!?!?!?!?
»» Submitted by What!?!?! at 11:35 AM on June 5
I don't see color. My people can only see in the ultraviolet/soft x-ray portion of the spectrum.
»» Submitted by »»» teucer at 11:39 AM on June 5
Meh, it's not my thing, but she's right about the high incidence of black guy/white girl interracial couples in the Twin Cities. The entry about Brazilian waxing, though....eek.
»» Submitted by yepnope at 11:46 AM on June 5
Imagine if a white guy married a Brazillian waxer, what would she think. I, for the record, have no multi-cultural friends.
»» Submitted by »»» kwatt at 11:50 AM on June 5
But why is that upsetting to her? Admittedly, I know little of racial issues, but why, given that she's married, would she even give a shit?
None, Kevin?
»» Submitted by yepnope at 11:52 AM on June 5
Studies have been done to show that it's better for the gene pool if people have babies with different races.
Or something.
»» Submitted by Christine at 11:55 AM on June 5
You gotta remember I have like four friends and the number dwindles almost by the day.
»» Submitted by »»» kwatt at 11:55 AM on June 5
Stop in-breeding, people!
»» Submitted by Christine at 11:55 AM on June 5
Kevin, I'm your friend. I'm half-Asian.
»» Submitted by Christine at 11:56 AM on June 5
Christine- yeah, I heard that too...
I'm afraid to even seriously address this here. I'm thinking it's not really worth my time.
»» Submitted by »»» ericam at 11:58 AM on June 5
I don't think it's really worth anyone's time, Erica...
Interestingly/oddly/some adverb-ly enough, I have a more diverse group of friends here in MN then I did in Boston or Los Angeles. However, I attended a college that was somewhat lacking in diversity and operated within that same social circle in both of those cities, so it kind of makes sense.
(And as far as waxing, take two Advil an hour before your appointment and the pain is negligible. It's kind of like drinking your coffee black; you just have to get used to it.)
»» Submitted by »»» josie at 11:56 AM on June 5
After reading the entry in question and a couple of other ones, I just think she's making a little fun. The piece in question is deliberately written to be tongue-in-cheek inflammatory. I see that she also used the "I don't see color" line.
»» Submitted by »»» teucer at 11:52 AM on June 5
"It's kind of like drinking your coffee black; you just have to get used to it."
Racist.
»» Submitted by »»» teucer at 12:03 PM on June 5
(And as far as waxing, take two Advil an hour before your appointment and the pain is negligible. It's kind of like drinking your coffee black; you just have to get used to it.)
Funny...that's the same strategery I use for running. Can't they use that numbing cotton ball they use for flu shots?
»» Submitted by »»» kwatt at 12:03 PM on June 5
I presume that was in the sarcasm font, teucer.
»» Submitted by »»» josie at 12:05 PM on June 5
I don't think she's saying it's a bad thing. I think she just thinks it's funny that mall-walking blondes, who as recently as 10 years ago likely would never have been dating a non-Lutheran, are hooking up with black men. Given how that's looked at in parts of the South, I'm not surprised she's amused.
But it's not completely acceptable in MN. I was talking to one of my lawyer friends who lives in Kenwood. She apparently has some multicult neighbors who are the scandal of the 'hood.
»» Submitted by »»» richg at 12:01 PM on June 5
I don't necessarily share the author's affection for white people, but when I was a teen, my ex-girlfriend's father used to comment that he felt bad for the children of interracial couples, because they would/could be ostracized within both the black and white communities. I used to find that thought jaw-droppingly offensive 20 years ago, but now that I better understand how segregated most communities are in this country (especially the one that he lived in at the time), I think he may have had a point. But I still think, above all (call me a fool if you must) that love is blind and that you can't help who you truly fall in love with.
»» Submitted by grote at 11:58 AM on June 5
Josie: Yup. Just being mischievous.
»» Submitted by »»» teucer at 12:06 PM on June 5
I fail to see the humor in any of her entries, not because I'm offended, but because, well, she's not funny...
It's a silly site, no doubt. My black female friends do have a terrible, awful time finding black guys to date in this town. It all works out in the end, but it's definitely an adjustment for a lot of women of color.
Or so I'm told.
»» Submitted by yepnope at 12:05 PM on June 5
Can't they use that numbing cotton ball they use for flu shots?
Not to completely hijack this thread, but anyway, a good waxer will use a spray-on numbing product to help ease the pain, and will work as quickly as possible. But really, once you've done it once or twice (on any body parts), it becomes merely uncomfortable as opposed to painful. And obviously bikini waxes are doubly awkward because your cha-cha is on display in front of someone who is not a doctor or significant other, and that someone is pouring hot wax on it.
I have a lot of respect for waxers. They see a whole lotta cooch.
»» Submitted by »»» josie at 12:06 PM on June 5
I have a lot of respect for waxers. They see a whole lotta cooch.
Line of the day right there.
»» Submitted by »»» kwatt at 12:11 PM on June 5
With the interracial couples I know, the family of the person of color is just as upset with the relationship as the family of the white person is.
And as far as racism is concerned, I've never heard a white person say (outloud anyway) "I hate black people," but I've heard plenty of people of color (blacks and indians) unapologetically say, "I hate white people."
»» Submitted by »»» mazasapa at 12:09 PM on June 5
he felt bad for the children of interracial couples, because they would/could be ostracized within both the black and white communities
I wholeheartedly agree with that statement. It's not always the case, but it definitely can be. I only have anecdotal evidence to support this, but a lot of mixed people feel more like "neither" than "both."
»» Submitted by »»» ericam at 12:14 PM on June 5
My girlfriend is an esthetician and waxes on a nigh daily basis. She has stories that approach the fine line between funny and forbidden knowledge that never should enter the awareness of man.
»» Submitted by »»» richg at 12:13 PM on June 5
Alie: FWIIW I think her blog is pretty funny. She may not be the funniest woman in the TC, but she's got a robust sense of humor. It's now on my daily read list, as is yours.
»» Submitted by »»» teucer at 12:16 PM on June 5
Rich, you know you want your balls waxed...
Well, I guess people likes what they likes...
I have a lot of respect for waxers. They see a whole lotta cooch.
Rich, you know you want your balls waxed...
See, this is why white people freak out black people.
»» Submitted by yepnope at 12:20 PM on June 5
What? What'd I say? Haha!
Allie, I think the time has come to confront your unhealthy obsession with teabagging and all associated fetishes.
»» Submitted by »»» richg at 12:20 PM on June 5
I love teabagging! It's the only way to get the tea as strong as I like it without cutting the damn bag open.
»» Submitted by »»» kwatt at 12:26 PM on June 5
Erica certainly speaks from more experience than I ever could -- I'm so white, when you cut me I bleed mayonnaise -- so I am inclinded to trust her anecdotal evidence on this touchy subject.
»» Submitted by »»» justpbob at 12:22 PM on June 5
Kevin, there are so many unpleasant connotations to that comment I have no idea where to begin.
»» Submitted by »»» richg at 12:31 PM on June 5
Someone who may or may not be me had a bikini wax in Los Angeles and had the following exchange with her (heavily Russian accented, which made it all the better) waxer:
"So, do you have a boyfriend?" - waxer
"Um, no." - waxee
"Well, maybe you'll get one with your new bikini wax!" - waxer
»» Submitted by »»» josie at 12:32 PM on June 5
Jeeze Rich, I have no response to that...I'm flabbergasted!
when you cut me I bleed mayonnaise -- Bob, have you had your cholesterol checked lately?
Kevin, there are so many unpleasant connotations to that comment I have no idea where to begin. -- Yeah. *squick*
»» Submitted by »»» ericam at 12:37 PM on June 5
in re balls...better to Nair or to wax?
»» Submitted by grote at 12:37 PM on June 5
CONFIRMED: stupidity knows no color.
not that it needed validation but luckily, here's sheletta.
»» Submitted by sofie at 12:27 PM on June 5
See, now I picture Josie running down the streets of LA, hollering, "Fellas! I'm smooooooth!" Which might work in LA.
I have a friend who runs a wholesaler for salons. She has instructional videos, which are not for the weak.
»» Submitted by yepnope at 12:44 PM on June 5
I have a friend who runs a wholesaler for salons. She has instructional videos
I could put those videos into a web-based, user-friendly eLearning format if your friend is interested.
»» Submitted by »»» mazasapa at 12:48 PM on June 5
Allie, you are never speechless. I view your brief silence as the time you need to prepare another salvo.
»» Submitted by »»» richg at 12:48 PM on June 5
I've heard that the "break this seal and watch only if things have gone wrong" DVD can freeze a goat into catatonia at up to 75 meters.
»» Submitted by »»» teucer at 12:48 PM on June 5
Maz, I'm pretty sure one could find the functional equivalent on the internets. It would take diligence, perserverance, and a bottle of Jamison, but it can be done. Half the dudes on this site are hot on the trail, as we speak.
»» Submitted by yepnope at 12:51 PM on June 5
Wait wait wait... This kind of thing can be found on the internet? Who knew?
See, now I picture Josie running down the streets of LA, hollering, "Fellas! I'm smooooooth!" Which might work in LA.
Heeeeee. I don't think it would necessarily work in Los Angeles because you basically are forced to remove all unwanted body hair upon crossing into the city limits. Smoothness is not an unusual state of being.
»» Submitted by »»» josie at 12:56 PM on June 5
Kevin, there are so many unpleasant connotations to that comment I have no idea where to begin.
Just tryin' to move the conversation along. I was referring to sucking the water out of teabags after you make a jug of sun tea. I used to tease my roommates by yelling, "Nick, it's time to teabag! I've tried it's delicious!" all the time.
»» Submitted by »»» kwatt at 12:56 PM on June 5
*pin drops*
»» Submitted by »»» teucer at 1:05 PM on June 5
From Sheletta's blog: Every black man--I swear got a white woman that he's married to or a white woman he's dating.
I have to disagree with this. Bigtime. Because every time I see a super-foxy black man, he's with a butt-fugly black woman. Bad clothes, bad hair, bad makeup, and just generally unattractive. Or, of course, he's gay.
»» Submitted by »»» alexis at 12:58 PM on June 5
Aaah Mah Gawd Becky! Her butt is soooo huge? Who does she think she is -- some rap-star's girlfriend?
I was dating asian girls before it became trendy.
(I'm putting that on t-shirts when I get my little screenprinting studio built in my basement)
»» Submitted by »»» ibran at 1:24 PM on June 5
Thank God that this thread veered away from the unfunniest "Funniest Woman in the Twin Cities" to some good old fashioned crotchal hair removal, something near and dear to most peoples' hearts. As for the "funny woman", I can't tell if she is being sarcastic or serious -- something that does not bode well for her "humor" but now I know about her 5:30 AM Sunday show on 45. Fianlly something to do as I slip in and out of a Goldschlager coma.
»» Submitted by »»» brian at 1:25 PM on June 5
Allie, you are never speechless. I view your brief silence as the time you need to prepare another salvo.
Sorry, Rich, didn't hear you...let me get this dick outta my ear...
all this talk of waxing and coochies is not something that makes me a productive boy at work
»» Submitted by »»» wayne at 1:52 PM on June 5
Hey--lighten up everybody--it's Sheletta--the blogger in question. Jut got back from taking my kid to story time at Red Balloon and my webmaster said "Oh, folks are reading your site!" Thanks for clicking on--whether you like it or not--the hits generate ad dollars--which generate pamper money for my 10 month old. The post in question is tongue-and-cheek humor, just like most of the entries on my site. I could care less who dates who--just an observation--just like most good comedy! Have a wonderful day--and happy posting. My son has baked a cake in his pamper and needs my immediate attention.
»» Submitted by Sheletta at 1:59 PM on June 5
My parents are interracial, and they hooked up in Minneapolis... back when "LBJ" referred to the sitting president.
Anyway, it's been my observation that the black guys that go for white girls like 'em "big and blonde", no matter how they arrive at it. I can't really include myself because I'm culturally white, and ethnically ambiguous, as is my brunette and olive-skinned wife, even though she's a Euro-mutt.
... and who else wants Erica to finish that thought?
»» Submitted by »»» champs at 1:54 PM on June 5
"Hey--lighten up everybody"
Racist.
»» Submitted by »»» teucer at 2:13 PM on June 5
"I have to disagree with this. Bigtime. Because every time I see a super-foxy black man, he's with a butt-fugly black woman. Bad clothes, bad hair, bad makeup, and just generally unattractive. Or, of course, he's gay."
Beauty standards are not universal, you know. And there are always other qualities that people see in others that aren't based on looks or style.
»» Submitted by »»» teucer at 2:13 PM on June 5
Teucer rocks.
Also, Sheletta rocks for posting here. I just wish I hadn't read the dirty diaper part while chewing on a mouthful of brown rice...
And the blonde fixation seems to cross many cultural lines. Sez the bitter brunette.
»» Submitted by yepnope at 2:24 PM on June 5
Way to ruin the vibe with the baby shit comment...ish
If it makes you feel better, yepnope, there's a significant percentage of us who greatly prefer those of the brunette persuasion.
Granted, there's also a significant percentage of the male population who just prefer those that breathe, but we MNSpeakers are a positive people, so we try to ignore them.
»» Submitted by »»» richg at 2:27 PM on June 5
Thanks, Rich. I don't know how picky some of these MnSpeak dudes are, though.
»» Submitted by yepnope at 2:35 PM on June 5
there's also a significant percentage of the male population who just prefer those that breathe
Perhaps that helps to explain the ugly person/attractive person phenomenon. I know I'm not the only Social Darwinist who sees it and thinks it's a damn shame.
»» Submitted by »»» alexis at 2:33 PM on June 5
Why is it a damn shame? Maybe they're selecting using other criteria, like brains, or fetishes.
»» Submitted by yepnope at 2:38 PM on June 5
Alexis, I think there's a different phenomenon at work there. I believe it's a combination of "hey! She puts out!" and a profound desire on the part of many attractive people to not only be the attractive member of the pairing, but to not be challenged and not have to work at the relationship.
»» Submitted by »»» richg at 2:37 PM on June 5
And there's something to be said for a badonkadonk too.
»» Submitted by »»» richg at 2:46 PM on June 5
Big nose fetish?
Cross-eyed fetish?
»» Submitted by Christine at 2:45 PM on June 5
Someone did say fetish right?
»» Submitted by Christine at 2:52 PM on June 5
On MNSpeak? Pretty much every day, Christine.
»» Submitted by »»» richg at 2:53 PM on June 5
he felt bad for the children of interracial couples, because they would/could be ostracized within both the black and white communities
I wholeheartedly agree with that statement. It's not always the case, but it definitely can be. I only have anecdotal evidence to support this, but a lot of mixed people feel more like "neither" than "both."
I disagree. I'm mixed and know a lot of mixed-race people. Sure, many have gone through an adolescent-confused-identity phase (as people of many different races do) but have emerged embracing (and being embraced by) both cultures and feeling enriched and socially-capable precisely because they have two cultures to draw from.
Besides, being mixed race is so hot right now. See: ethnically ambiguous local newcasters in most major cities.
I think we can all agree that compared to other cities, Minneapolis is a pretty white city and can feel extra white because it's also segregated -- but I don't think that anyone moving here from elsewhere would expect anything else.
Yeah -- that website isn't funny.
»» Submitted by observer at 2:41 PM on June 5
there's definitely a lot of white mentality in mpls.
»» Submitted by sasha at 3:53 PM on June 5
My black female friends do have a terrible, awful time finding black guys to date in this town. It all works out in the end, but it's definitely an adjustment for a lot of women of color.
Ahahahahahahahahhahahhhahah!
I am sure it does!
»» Submitted by bud jr at 4:03 PM on June 5
I don't know, bud, I hear it's a real stretch.
»» Submitted by »»» kwatt at 4:06 PM on June 5
emerged embracing (and being embraced by) both cultures and feeling enriched and socially-capable precisely because they have two cultures to draw from
I can see that point, but IMO it's overstating the case a little. Or maybe living in less-diverse Minnesota confounds it because you don't have to shift between as often. I mean, really. It is really white here. Not scary Utah or Idaho white, but pretty damn white. But I guess I'm kind of used to it because every time I go somewhere else, I'm mildly surprised by the fact that I'm surprised by all the brown people.
Besides, being mixed race is so hot right now. See: ethnically ambiguous local newcasters in most major cities.
Speaking of fetishes. The fact that it's hot right now isn't necessarily a good thing.
»» Submitted by »»» ericam at 4:04 PM on June 5
Kudos to Rich for correct usage of the term "badonkadonk".
brains and shaved hoo-has turn me on.
»» Submitted by »»» wayne at 4:58 PM on June 5
Thanks for the info wayne, I'll make sure to write that down...
just sayin'
»» Submitted by »»» wayne at 5:02 PM on June 5
Wayne, that's probably TMI.
»» Submitted by »»» josie at 5:04 PM on June 5
why is it than when some of us try to make a funny, it turns out like Michael on The Office...painfully unfunny without a hint of irony. And then someone chimes in just like Dwight. Bud...jan would like to have a word with you. And, Dwigh...er, Kevin...don't encourage him.
»» Submitted by grote at 4:56 PM on June 5
Wow...
»» Submitted by yepnope at 5:05 PM on June 5
brains and shaved hoo-has turn me on.
and now you know why Wayne goes through a box of kleenex watching the Scripps National Spelling Bee
»» Submitted by grote at 5:05 PM on June 5
"and now you know why Wayne goes through a box of kleenex watching the Scripps National Spelling Bee"
Dear. God.
I'm not sure if I'm allowed to laugh at that.
»» Submitted by David Foureyes at 5:09 PM on June 5
Oh, Christ.
»» Submitted by »»» josie at 5:14 PM on June 5
Is that list in order? You renaissance man, you.
»» Submitted by »»» teucer at 5:06 PM on June 5
It's time to raze this thread to the ground; Max can collect on the insurance money.
»» Submitted by »»» teucer at 5:16 PM on June 5
Spelling bees aren't about brains, man. Just about memorization. Show me some critical thinking skillz and bald lady parts and I'm off.
»» Submitted by »»» wayne at 5:39 PM on June 5
Please stop saying things like "bald lady parts," it makes me so sorry that I converted this thread into a waxing conversation...
(Wayne's porn collection must be really interesting.)
»» Submitted by »»» josie at 5:47 PM on June 5
Yuk. Just yuk.
»» Submitted by »»» kwatt at 5:58 PM on June 5
Bald Lady Parts...
»» Submitted by grote at 5:58 PM on June 5
Sample titles from Wayne's shelf o' DVDs:
"Didactism and Dildos"
"Stick it in My Kant"
»» Submitted by »»» richg at 6:09 PM on June 5
and "I Am So Underpaid: True Confessions of a Local Slut"
»» Submitted by »»» kwatt at 6:16 PM on June 5
Richg salvages the wreckage!
Ideal Forms II - Beyond Platonic
A Posteriori - Backdoor Experience
Taking Liberties II - Utilitarian 3-way action
Spanking Co-eds
»» Submitted by »»» teucer at 6:29 PM on June 5
Speaking of fetishes. The fact that it's hot right now isn't necessarily a good thing.
I agree. I was being (or trying to be) facetious.
»» Submitted by observer at 6:42 PM on June 5
Where are all these interracial couples? I've hardly seen any around here. I'm from Iowa, and there were definitely more down there. Twin Cities is still pretty segregated.
»» Submitted by an ex-Iowan at 10:00 PM on June 5
I'm white Minnesota man and I married a black woman.
She's an import.
I mean, foreign.
Well, I haven't posted in a while. I graduated from college on Sunday. I received PhD - Player Hating Degree. Now that I have my degree, I feel more qualified to hate on things, thus I can resume commenting on MnSpeak.
Anyway, I can't be bothered to read the actual post but I'm wondering if she won the ACME contest? Damn that contest...the first two years I did it I advanced to the semi's and I've had a streak of poor decision-making by the judges the past two years. I've seen a lot of good people get knocked out by people who suck (and I've seen it happen a few times). I'm not saying that I was one of the "good people", I'm saying I've seen others I thought should win lose. Anywho...
So, is the interesting thing about this post that a lot of black men are with white women in Minnesota? Really? That's fucking crazy! I mean, in Minnesota? The most diverse state in the country? I mean, where do black men find all these white women. As a black person, I often find myself wondering, why are there so few white people in Minnesota? Sometimes, when I am walking around Block E (actually, I'm usually loitering outside) I feel like I'm in Atlanta, DC or Detroit.
From the post:
Me and my husband--we don't see color (unless it sees us first) we see people who are friendly and we just attach ourselves to them.
How great that blind people are blogging these days!
My black female friends do have a terrible, awful time finding black guys to date in this town. It all works out in the end, but it's definitely an adjustment for a lot of women of color.
Um, that's not really unique to the Twin Cities...
Actually, the entire post isn't unique to the Twin Cities.
»» Submitted by »»» Bixby at 8:56 AM on June 6
"...I received PhD - Player Hating Degree..."
Many congratulations, Bixby. Or, I should say, Doctor Bixby... What is it in?
»» Submitted by »»» teucer at 9:46 AM on June 6
...Aside from Player Hating, that is. I see that current academic thinking goes counter to the prevailing belief that we should hate the game.
»» Submitted by »»» teucer at 9:57 AM on June 6
I'm a humble person, Bixby is fine. Actually, I minored in game hating. I think its unfortunate that people think hating the player and hating the game are mutually exclusive. This belief is indicative of the crises that plague higher education in America.
»» Submitted by »»» Bixby at 10:01 AM on June 6
Say Bixby ... now that you've graduated from college and all, are you going to update your profile photo? You'll notice I updated mine.
»» Submitted by »»» mazasapa at 10:10 AM on June 6
That's a pretty dashing photo, Maz.
and recent too. heh
»» Submitted by »»» mazasapa at 10:14 AM on June 6
Congrats, Bixby! Player hating is the rare liberal arts degree with real world utility.
»» Submitted by yepnope at 10:10 AM on June 6
what porn collection? I have live models that pose for me, because I'm rich and eccentric*!
*I wish.
»» Submitted by »»» wayne at 10:23 AM on June 6
That's a pretty dashing photo, Maz.
I'll have to look around for a photo of Afro Bob you all can enjoy. I wasn't kidding bout my 'fro.
»» Submitted by »»» justpbob at 10:34 AM on June 6
»»» = registered user. click on it to see the user's profile.
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