The daily digest of Twin Cities culture | Secrets of the City

NO! NO! NO! It's about big fast stupid republican suburbanites in SUVs who hate cyclists! TRAINS! TRAINS! *%$@ing IDIOTS!!

Sorry 'bout that. I was channeling wayne there for a moment.

Actually, Hecker's "green" ads on the buses refer to his new rent-a-car business, Advantange, which is in the process of switching its entire fleet to high fuel efficient, alternative fuel or hybrid vehicles.

oh and even if it is "supposed to" mean what b.rivera said, that's not how most people interpret it. So either DH has got one hell of a tin ear or he's still a giant fucking asshole. If he were so stupid to not see how that would be offensive, that's actually almost as offensive as being a straight up douchefuck.

So lemme get this straight...Wayne, you're against a rental car company switching its fleet over to high-efficiency vehicles?

uh, when did I mention anything about that, andrew?
in either case, he's obviously doing it because he sees it as a trend, and not because he gives a shit.

and how are you fuckers so dense to not see denny hecker giving a big finger to everyone riding the bus with 'nobody walks,' considering that's exactly what most people do when they get on or off the bus.

ps, if anyone is not an asshole and actually understands how this is a dick move, you can leave mr. hecker some love mail here: http://comment.dennyhecker.com/

uh, when did I mention anything about that, andrew?

uh, upthread, wayne, after I mocked you (I just can't do you as well as you do you):

"Actually, Hecker's "green" ads on the buses refer to his new rent-a-car business, Advantange, which is in the process of switching its entire fleet to high fuel efficient, alternative fuel or hybrid vehicles."

We need a contest to out-Wayne Wayne. Then the winner of that and the winner of the Kirsten-off can have a bikes suck vs. autos suck debate on the roof patio of Britts. Comedy gold.

You're hilarious, Wayne.

So much for out-Wayning Wayne. Nobody could do that. It's like trying to outswim that Phelps kid.

Well advertising cars on the side of a bus is bad enough to start with, but using such loaded language is straight up douchebaggery.

If Denny Hecker had a big billboard on one of his car dealerships, would he sell advertising to metrotransit to put up an ad that said "Driving is for chumps! Take the bus!"?

Doubtful. He's taking advantage of the fact that MT is screwed by the state for funding and needs every dollar it can get.

(And ineffective attempts at irony, as demonstrated by the last sentence of that previous post.)

well maybe poor people don't have tvs and don't listen to the radio in the cars they don't have.

I love the fever over a sign! His fat advertising dollars are only beneficial to Metro Transit, yet he's demonised. Only a pseudo-punk reactionaryist bitch would be personally offended by that signage; and the next time the transit workers strike, everyone can jump in their Hyundais, Toyotas, and VWs with the "Hecker" stamp on the trunk/bumper and make the complete drive into downtown instead of stopping at the Park-and-Ride Lots scattered about and hopping a bus, then spouting off about Denny and his ilk because it's just as fashionable as "being green". Splash some water on your face man. Sure, let his businesses wither and die, quit accepting evil for-profit dollars, then stop charging $2 for a fare, which is a fraction of the operating cost. They might as well charge nothing at all! Cars aren't going away, gasoline will be here for as long as any of us are alive, and mass transit isn't "the answer"; you're not going to convince people to make what would essentially be an all-day pilgrimage when they can, say, make the same 25-minute drive each way from Mpls-to-Woodbury to see a 2-hour movie at a favorite theater; it's just not going to happen. Me, I leave my car running during the movie, A/C on, and I always drive the scenic routes, and I encourage everyone to do the same. Comfort is key! WHo want's to hop into a hot car? Not me. It's quite dangerous actually.

By the way, douchebaggery can be retired everyone. PLEASE! But if you want to use it, what do I care.

was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor!?!?!?

I think Mr.Hecker means you will buy a car or an unnamed business associate will break your legs, I'm certain of it.

you'd see how that could possibly offend a regular bus rider

I also see how it could be an inspiration to run for an irregular bus rider. I mean, when you have to go, you have to go.

The fact that virtually everyone has seen the signs (although some interpret their message in very different ways) is a testimony to how successful his advertising campaign has been.

Jesus.

The weirdest thing of all is that the pic of Hecker in that latest ad -- you know, where his shirt's half unbuttoned and he's in the middle of manly chuckle like he's ready to strip down to his skivvies and wrestle you -- is only the second pic of I've seen of him, period.

Every other ad I'd seen prior is the one where he's sort of turning around in a blue tie, and he's about to say something...

not locally germane, but here is an interesting piece in the WSJ about San Francisco bike lane backlash. The crazy litigious welfare pedestrian dude raises some valid points about bike culture. He hates bikes AND cars, so I trust him to have a neutral opinion about how they ought to be treated in urban spaces. If this doesn't trigger a Wayne meltdown cursefest, not sure what will.

BTW...anyone out there considering riding in Critical Mass on the 29th? Should be an interesting prelude to the RNC.

I'd say it is low blood sugar. Often people with low blood suger get REALLY crabby, but they have no clue it is anything but genuine, justified anger. Then they eat something and feel better. We've seen it a dozen times here. He spews vitriol, goes silent, then apologizes (sort of).

I am guessing the clueless shitbrick comment is not deleted b/c it exemplifies the irrational vitriol.

p.s. I like the word vitriol, cut me some slack.

When shitbricks get a clue the Asstransit Revolution will begin.

Often people with low blood suger get REALLY crabby, but they have no clue it is anything but genuine, justified anger.

This is why I don't schedule 11 am meetings. Everyone that knows me knows to make sure I am regularly fed otherwise cranky doesn't begin to describe me.

Wayne I needed a laugh. You are the man. I always appriciate your pasion. Yes denny is a dick. wtf, I agree with wayne today.

I have eaten now, but I still think denny hecker is a turd.

At least he didn't ask you to "rock star" him, joyride...

Well, he technically did, but not in so many words.

This thread is hilarious. I can picture the meeting at Denny Hecker World HQ:

"Let's taunt the pedestrians in town."
"What pedestrians?"
"yeah, Nobody walks, right?"
"Damn straight, Nobody walks!"
"Hey that's a good slogan."
"Let's put it on the side of a bus to mock everyone walking around!"
"Genius!"

Mason--

You forgot to tell him that you were doing all this in Uptown.

...and listening to Weezer.

while paying someone to jackhammer random spots on the bike paths.

Mason--
You forgot to tell him that you were doing all this in Uptown.
»» Submitted by »»» joyride at 1:20 PM on August 20

Hollywood Video parking lot, 2pm, and again at 4pm across the street from Wedge grocery, all this week! Come one come all. I'll also be getting a right arm (obviously!) sleave of Limbaugh/map of Middle East/Pervez Musharraf fundraiser @ Sabrina's on Sat.

g-rote - I read that WSJ article this morning, too.

The guy does seem to have valid points - Cars way outnumber bicycles and taking away car lanes does have an environmental impact by reducing MPG and causing more idling.

His argument was compelling enough that San Francisco has to do an environmental impact study on the detrimental environmental effects of new bike paths.

The article got me thinking - How many more food calories does a biker have to compared compared to a non-biker to support the extra energy needed to ride the bike? For example, Michael Phelps has been eating 12000 calories a day)

And how much energy does it take to produce an average food-calorie? How much pollution and CO2 is made from producing a food calorie?

Is it possible that driving 10 miles can emit less net C02 then biking 10 miles? Is there a study on this?

It just seems odd to see an ad like that when there's this huge "go green" movement today.

as big as the green movement is, I daresay the green backlash is / will be even bigger.

This whole thread reminded me of a news story that occurred when lived in Atlanta.

At the time, Dominos Pizza launched its Avoid the Noid ad campaign. Never really figured out what that campaign was about or what the Noid was.

Anyway, It went on for awhile until some guy whose last name was Noid had heard enough. He armed himself to the teeth and took over a Domino's Pizza. Forced the people to cook him a pizza.

After the cops talked him into surrendering Mr. Noid said that Domino's CEO Tom Monaghan broke into his apartment and rummaged through his belongings.

The End.

He also demanded a copy of The Widow's Son. But I suspect he didn't actually want a Robert Anton Wilson book, but was calling out to fellow Masons to help him.

I read he broke in to spray pizza scent and leave a booklet of expired coupons and an advanced copy of Bill Cosby's Where You Lay Your Head... that'd make me crazy.

Tom Monahan was responsible for the firing of Ernie Harwell, and he made Bo Schembechler the fall guy for it. Not to mention his pizza is horrible. I can assure you there's a special corner of hell reserved for him.

Pizza a grunt food.

"Good people helping good people," I guess, if you believe that.

Pizza a grunt food.

Oh god... Beefus has gotten to Rat. No Beefus!! NO!!!!

Dude, you want to lose weight? Do NOT skip breakfast.

Depends on how big of a breakfast one has. Michael Phelps eats 10,000 calories per day and has four-egg omelets with a mess of pancakes for breakfast each training day.

The only GUARANTEED way to lose weight is to eat fewer calories each day than your body burns. Exercise will speed up the calorie-burning. Phelps is obviously burning most of his fuel away but I wouldn't necessary recommend his kind of breakfast to anyone but a hard-training athlete.

Aw man, do we really have to drag "Stuff White People Like" into this now?

I didn't realize that was uncouthe!

From my experience, only pork, bacon, and other pig based foods are grunt foods. Whereas turkey is a gobble gobble food, and chicken, of course, is a buck buck buck buckAWW food.

now you're splitting hairs. she got the point across.

OK, so I admit that the 'correct' interpretation of the ad escaped me, probably due to some combination of stupidity, brief glances not catching the fine print, not knowing about the other advertising, and my anti-car perspective. But that doesn't mean that the "nobody walks" in giant bold letters going by on a bus next to an SUV and Hecker's heckling grin can't be read as kind of an insult.

The auto companies, oil companies, rubber companies, and other construction interests have spent the last 50 years and untold millions blatantly undermining transit funding in the USA, lobbying the gov't to create a world where it's literally true that nobody walks. WCCO's tiny Nicollet Mall frontage is probably the only space in the T.C. where you could consistently get a critical mass of pedestrians to appear as a backdrop for an evening news broadcast. The last think I want to see emblazoned on my city's podunk transit system is Hecker's oily chesthair.

P.S. I found Hecker's ingratiating faux-folksy Minnesota-ness annoying for years, too. (Admittedly successful, though.)

P.P.S. Do you think he was the basis for Jerry Lundegaard?

I like tuhtles.

Most times, a picture of a banana is just a picture of a banana, billiam.

What, no link? You can't expect me to google that name on my own!

As someone pointed out here, Denny Hecker's money does more to keep public transportation running than all you mugs put together

I love the nightlife...I got to boogie.

Bob Rohrman.

The one's with the cartoon lion that at the end "roared" Bob ROOOARman" were the worst.

Come to think of it after watching that ad, is there something you're hiding from us jpbob?

I figured out Santa Claus was a fake on my own. After that he was dead to me.

I can't be the only person who thinks the way the "I like the Tin Man" kid is dressed is pretty cool.

But that doesn't mean that the "nobody walks" in giant bold letters going by on a bus next to an SUV and Hecker's heckling grin can't be read as kind of an insult.

::: sigh :::

Anything can be taken as an insult -- even a compliment -- if a person is too sensitive.

I think the only way a person could be insulted by seeing Denny and "Nobody Walks" on the side of a bus is if they have serious issues with authority. "No friggin' way is some dude with a half-buttoned shirt gonna tell ME what the hell to do!" Or if someone has a Guilty White Liberal Complex, who empathizes with the downtrodden masses but who doesn't realize just how condescending it is to be their "advocate."

Simmer down. Relax. Take a deep breath. The guy buys advertising to sell cars or financing; not insult people.

Are you going to have to choke a car dealer, Max?

My first apartment in Atlanta had a promotion called Money Talks: Nobody Walks. Hadda a big banner that ran the length of one building facing Roswell Road.

Jane, I make mine with day old Challa and stuff it with banana slices. The custard is made with half and half and a bit of vanilla and nutmeg.

Max, if'n ya wanna I can borrow you my helmet and goggles. You're on your own for the striped scarf though...

Buck up walkers! I just heard Nancy Sinatra sing "These Boots Are made For Walking." It isn't all an anti-pedestrian world out there!

I make a kick ass custard baked french toast too! No nanas... that's for monkeys.

It sounds to me like brunch at Alie's would be all wieners and bananas...

mnblrmkr- are you bucking for me to host a brunch?

You're offering?

Is that a euphemism?

Okay, I have to ask, what is grunt food?

Oh. I like grunt food, then. Not exclusively, but I like tacos, pizza, tater tots, bread n butter samwiches, etc.